The hypermuffin's daycare is putting together a recipe collection as a fundraiser. They want to collect 150 recipes. So far, they have 26.

Five of those are mine -- and unfortunately, although I could easily stock them with 150 recipes all by myself, I'm limited to contributing only five.

I was considering logging on under a few nommes de plume -- Howard Alan Treesong, Natalia Romanova, Hal Jordan -- heck, toss in Alan Scott, Guy Gardner, John Stewart, and Kyle Rayner while I'm at it. Or, for a more female-oriented bunch of names, I was thinking of using the names of high school classmates of mine. Niloufar is a name that should be seen more often!

Anyway, before resorting to massive feats of duplicity in order to stock the daycare's recipe booklet, I thought I would turn to you.

If you have a few minutes to input between 1 and 5 recipes on their little recipe-inputting site, in order to get their recipe total up, I'd appreciate it, and so would my adorably charming 3-year old, one is sure.

Instructions

EDIT: Deadline is July 3, so you have some time... but don't put it off too long or you will forget. Don't ask me how I know this. *blush*

Today's toddler report sheet from daycare, together with what they REALLY meant...

"Vivian had an exciting day."
        (this is code for "They couldn't get her to settle down")

"She played puzzles with her friends very nicely."
        (always start off with something good)

"We are still working on listening and staying with her group during group activities."
       (In other words, she doesn't even look around when you call her name and she's charging in the opposite direction from where you want her to be.)

"We played with soft toys, pop blocks and flash cards, too."
       (and always end with something good.)


Yeah, Vivian won't listen to me when I'm calling her name. I seriously doubt she will listen to some strange daycare provider.

As for staying with the group -- Vivian is far more interested in exploring new territory than in playing with the brightly colored, age-appropriate toys we set out for her. I can't even count how many play dates / park outings have seen the other kids quietly staying put and playing with their appointed toys, while Vivian charged off up stairs, down stairs, through bushes, through gates, over rocks -- with either Andrew or me trailing behind, huffing and puffing, behind her, desperately trying to keep up so we can make sure she doesn't injure herself!

Today was Vivian's second Monday at the new daycare. Calling in the middle of the day just to see how things are going doesn't mean I'm a hyper-hovering overattentive uber-Seattle-yuppie parent, does it? That would be, like, calling twice a day, right?

She only napped for 45 minutes, which let me tell you is NOT enough for her. Two solid hours at least, that girl usually needs.

You would think she would go right to sleep, but she always spends some time playing and relaxing in her room before actually deigning to sleep. Right now I hear the tinny, electronic sounds of "The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round," interspersed with Elmo and Big Bird's voices saying things like <obnoxious, high-pitched sing-song voice> "Elmo wants to play the 'Let's Find Game!'"</voice>

Apparently she had a pretty good day, although she cried off and on during the morning -- but I think she was just overtired from the Daylight Savings Time switch.

They played with Play-Dough, and did an art project in which they glued eyes, a mouth, and a nose onto a paper plate to make a face. When I picked her up, she had thin patches of dried glue on her arms and fingers.

I remember when happiness was a thin film of glue on my fingers, to be carefully picked off and flicked away. Glue! Gotta love it.

On Monday when I dropped Vivian off at daycare, the teacher brightly said "Today is her last day!" "Huh??" I replied -- last I'd heard, the center would be open until the end of March.

Nope -- because they only had 3 or 4 kids who would have been there during the month of March, some of whom were part-time, they are closing at the end of February. I.e., tomorrow.

There was a letter in my mail slot there, but I hadn't gotten it last week because it was a holiday, so...

I would have thought they would have called us, but the entire office staff had already left, and the director is also busy directing a new location over in Bellevue.

I called the daycare center that was going to take Vivian on Mondays, starting in April, and luckily for us, they could take her a month early!

We stopped by for a couple of hours this afternoon, and will do so again Friday afternoon, to help get her used to the new daycare.She did very well, I thought -- playing with the other kids and interacting socially as much as 2-year olds do (which is not much). She wasn't very good at following the teachers' directions yet, but that will come the longer she's there.

They even gave her some juice in a cup, and she drank it without spilling it all over herself.

I faded back into a corner and watched... My little girl is getting all grown up! :-)

If it's not one thing, it's another. We just got an e-mail with the next big thing for us -- news that Vivian's day care will be closing at the end of March at the latest, and possibly before.

Apparently the State has imposed many, many new and expensive requirements for the center's improvement, structural improvements like adding new kitchens and bathrooms, some of which would mandate closing it down while the improvements were made. And they just can't afford to close for construction, even for a little bit.

In the meantime the church from which they leased the building has upped the rent by about 600% -- they used to provide a below-market rent as a service or a Christian type "mission," but then they decided they couldn't afford to do that anymore and needed to get more money out of the property, and that's certainly their right.

We use it only one day a week, which is pretty unusual -- most of the places I contacted while we were searching told me that they weren't able to take a child for only one day a week.

I really liked this place. I liked the Montessori method of supporting the children while they learned through structured play. I liked their use of cloth diapers. I approved of other choices they made that seemed smart and thoughtful.

Unfortunately, a lot of those choices were very expensive, like paying such high salaries to the teachers, giving them fully paid-by-the-center medical benefits, and mandating all sorts of ongoing training for them. Not to mention the organically grown snacks, the field trips, all those enriching Montessori materials... Maybe saving up a nest egg to tide them over in case of emergencies, and cutting back just a bit on the art supplies would have been smarter, in the long run.

Vivian loved it. Yesterday she cried when I picked her up because she didn't want to leave. I was looking forward to several years of enrichment and stimulation for her on Mondays.

If the center closes at the end of March, and my maternity leave only starts around the beginning of June, that leaves April and May to get through somehow. I don't know what we'll do for those couple months, since it's hard enough to find a place that will take Vivian for only one day a week, much less a place that will take Vivian for only one day a week for only two months. ...

... but we'll see. Maybe my work will give me the flexibility to work from home THREE days a week (Mon. - Tue. - Fri.) instead of only two.

Tonight from 6 to 8 or so we'll be attending a local school fair that will have representatives from over 50 schools. I'm sure some of them will be preschools and other early elementary schools. Maybe we can find a place for her starting August or September-ish. Maybe we can find a place that won't turn around and close on us after only a few months... :-P

I know Vivian is getting bigger. I have to get new clothes down from the attic for her all the time, and she's always adding new tricks and new syllables to her repertoire. She can play "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes," and she communicates very well, even though she can't really speak yet.

But somehow it takes me by surprise when other people see it, too.

Today there was a big sheaf of papers in my mailbox at the Haller Lake Children's Center, where we drop Vivian off on Mondays. We got home and I was feeding her dinner before I had a chance to flip through them. Here's what they said.

Today's report: Ate all her lunch, napped from 11:50 to 1:45. Comments: "Activity time: We painted with ice! Vivian spent the morning with the Explorers! :-) "

I thought, Wow, she spent the morning with the Explorers, huh? (That's the class that's a step above Vivian's "Sunbeams" class.)

The next packet in my pile was telling me that they'd like to move Vivian up to the Explorers permanently, because they think she's ready. Here are the comments they made about her, justifying why she is ready to move up:

"She runs, can throw balls, and gives great hugs!
She is a very happy, friendly girl. She likes other children and plays beside them.
Vivian likes stories and singing."

It may not seem like a big deal to anyone reading this, because of the following facts of life:

Children grow.
Vivian is a child.
Therefore, Vivian is growing.
(Duh, Catherine.)

But to ME, reading this pamphlet telling me that my little girl is growing out of being a "Sunbeam" and is going to be an "Explorer," well, it's probably the hormones, but I burst into happy tears. *sniff*

The "Explorers" have a much more set structure to their day, and it includes "circle and story time," "open activity time," lots of singing and dancing and bubbles and parachute games, cleaning up (Vivian loves wiping off her own booster seat tray after meals), and a whole bunch of other stuff... and they take field trips sometimes.

And the price is $30 less a month than we were paying for her as a "Sunbeam." (Not sure why. Maybe younger children are more trouble or a greater liability?)

So, I've probably lost most of my audience, I know, since it takes either a fellow parent or a true friend to care this much about me caring this much about something so small.

But my little Vivian is growing up! Aw, someone hand me the Kleenex again. Geez. *sniff*

The only nice thing about reading other people's to-do lists is that it helps you feel smug and appreciative that you don't have to do those things.

So, in the interests of improving y'all Saturdays, here's my list for the day.

Acquire the following items at various stores:
Two short, squat, "123 Lithium" batteries, to replace the ones in the smoke detector that apparently ran out of juice. Until we get the smoke detector working again, our security system will continue freaking out for no good reason.

Sectioned Tupperware / Gladware that will fit into my soft-sided lunchbox, the better to pack Vivian's nutritionally-appropriate lunches on Mondays

Extra hat, extra gloves

Large leaf / lawn bags -- 4 are needed for Vivian's emergency kit; one to sit on, one for a raincoat, and "2 for sanitation needs." Vivian isn't even 20 pounds. I am intimately familiar with how much waste she generates, and I seriously doubt she could generate enough to fill two large leaf / lawn bags, even counting cloth diapers, which are quite bulky! Maybe in 5 days, all her combined poop / diapers / food scraps would fill ONE large leaf / lawn bag. Maybe. But the emergency food kit I had to buy for her only contains enough food and water for three days...

Penlight and batteries

Gallon of distilled water (since there's already water included in the emergency supplies kit, I assume this gallon is for washing)

While I'm out with Vivian, drop off donations at thrift store

Do blue laundry

Replace light bulbs (you may scoff at such a small task making it onto my list, but it's difficult to do with Vivian around because she tries to climb up on the chair with me, and I trip over her, which is bad when you're 2 feet off the ground! So this has to happen while she naps.)

Sweep & mop floors (again, this task can ONLY be accomplished while Vivian sleeps, otherwise she will play with the piles of dirt before I can sweep them up)

We ended up enrolling Vivian at the PC child care center.

I'm smiling to myself at some of the things I've encountered at this place so far -- it's a Montessori, so I guess that should have warned me how it would be.

I have a lot in common with this place, don't get me wrong.
* I already practice child-driven activities, allowing Vivian to go at her own pace, instead of parent-driven activities.
* I already focus on the process, not the results.
* I already use positive language ("Hold up your coat! If you let it drag, it gets dirty!") instead of negative language ("Don't drag your coat on the ground!").
* And I think it's great they use cloth diapers (so do I), and only organic food (wish I could afford it).
* And I understand having the entire center be completely peanut-free, since some children are deathly allergic to peanuts and can't even be at the same table as a child who is eating a peanut butter sandwich without swelling up with hives and having to be rushed to the ER. (how did the human race survive, I wonder, before peanut-free classrooms? Did a certain small percentage of children just die of peanut allergies, and there was nothing to be done about it??)

But there are some rules at this place that, in my opinion, are silly.

We had to sign a consent form for them to put sunscreen on Vivian! And whenever anyone puts sunscreen on her, they have to fill out a line of the form with the date and their initials!

If we want them to use Desitin, or Orajel, or any over-the-counter medication on her, we have to bring it to the office with her name and the date on it, and change it out every 6 months, and we have to include specific instructions for when they should use it. We can't just say "as needed," because whose judgment call would that be?

And then if they ever put a smear of Desitin on Vivian's little butt, they have to sign the form. Sheesh! These are *over the counter* medications. The procedures are even more strict for prescription medication.

We have to prepare a disaster kit for her -- a gallon of distilled water with her name on it, a gallon freezer bag filled with things like a penlight (as though Vivian would be able to use a penlight!), a "comfort letter," contact info, trash bags to sit on, changes of clothes, etc. We had to buy their $18 disaster kit as well, which includes a thin reflective blanket to maximize body heat, and a bunch of other stuff.

Heck, we aren't this prepared here at home. I guess if there's a disaster on a Monday, she will be all set.

I need to send a lunch with Vivian (makes sense, I will probably be doing that for school in a few years). And it has to meet the nutritional guidelines set out by the state of washington. If it doesn't, they will "supplement" Vivian's lunch and then bill me for it (!). The guidelines are the typical mix of protein / veggies / etc. They also took pains to tell me that if I sent cheese, that could count either for protein OR for dairy, but not for both. (I don't think the human body looks at it that way!)

Also, they don't accept junk food, candy, or foods in overly commercial packaging (Disney princess fruit roll-ups, or anything like that, for instance). If I send food like that, they will "not be able to serve it" and it will be returned to me at the end of the day.

I mean, it's great that all the kids will have uncool lunches. When I was in school, I was always the kid with the uncool lunch. At this place, all the kids have them. So I guess I shouldn't complain. But what happens if someone decides the food I sent with Vivian doesn't meet state nutritional guidelines? Isn't that a judgment call?

Another weird thing: If we want to celebrate our child's birthday in class by handing out treats (which is not the norm but isn't forbidden either), those treats can't be homemade. They have to be bought at a store. Doesn't that seem odd to you? Why can't I make, say, homemade piroshki for Vivian (if I were Russian, which I'm not) to share with her classmates? What about being inclusive of other cultures? My culture celebrates using piroshki, darn it! -- Or it would, if I were Russian. I already know not to put peanuts in the piroshki, and to make them nutritionally compliant with Washington State regulations. (eyeroll)

It may be a bit over the top, but I feel a lot more comfortable with her there than next door. I don't think that would have been a good idea. I even think this beats the nanny -- it's cheaper, and there is more social interaction for her. The "teachers" in her room seem really nice and I think she's already bonded with the lead teacher.

But wow. They have a lot of rules.

Christ the King Catholic Church, which is just a bit north and across Greenwood from us, has a church school, and apparently a pretty good one (according to their website, anyway!). (http://www.ckseattle.org/)

But it looks like the earliest age of kids is preschool, around age 3. Vivian isn't even 1 and a half yet.

The search continues...

Thanks so much to all of you for responding with advice -- sounds like a unanimous vote for helping Vivian learn how to interact with other kids, and a unanimous vote that a nanny is not the way to go.

I agree -- socializing with other children, learning how to share and how to get pushed down and stand back up -- is such an important thing for a child to learn. I want to put her in a place with other kids, for sure.

I'm not sure if the next-door neighbors are the right solution, though, because I've been observing the house pretty closely this week, and they're never outside, even though the weather is glorious and they have a fenced yard with all kinds of toys in it. Vivian has A LOT of energy. I can't see her cooped up inside their very small house every Monday over the winter.

Also, I'm not sure how many adults would be there -- just the mom? And how many kids? And a 2-month old? I just don't know if that's the right answer...

We did interview the nanny, and while I like her just fine, if we're going to pay that much money I really do want an accredited child care center with lots of other kids around (and other teachers in case one gets sick!).

Turns out the PC child care center is a lot cheaper than I thought it would be -- about half what I guessed -- but still more expensive than I'd like. It also turns out that our close neighbors (and financial advisor) send their son there. We'll call them tonight and ask what they think of the place.

I found another child care center even closer, and cheaper, but Vivian's age group is full. We're on the waiting list for that one, but she was estimating there might be a spot no sooner than November. Unless something unexpected happens, like another family moving away or something...

We'll be able to find a place for her. The trade-offs between quality, availability, and price remain to be negotiated.

Well, we've managed to put it off long enough, but the time has come to choose a child care provider for Vivian. Someone who is not me, or Andrew, or one of our friends, or a family member.

We've made it 16 months without ever having to pay someone to watch her... but starting in a few weeks, Andrew will need to be in his office on Mondays, and I will also need to be in my office on Mondays. So, we will need child care for one day a week.


Candidate 1: The Politically Correct Child Care Center.
Haller Lake Children's Center.
Pros: Looks great! They have all the bells and whistles, including a bunch of sound-bite filled verbiage about how their children are treasured and empowered and yada yada yada. I can do without the buzzwords, but looking at their offerings, I am quite impressed with everything they have. Indoor gym, water play, music and singing (Vivian would love that!), fingerpainting, simple games, "buggy rides in our neighborhood" -- and that's just for the toddler class. Older kids get a lot more enrichment.

They are a licensed in-home day care center. We could put any fees paid as a direct deduction off our taxes.

Cons: I would guess that it's pricey -- they don't post their rates, and that's a bad sign.

I e-mailed awhile ago asking whether they accept children for one day a week only -- I doubt it -- and then this morning I also called and left a message. Honestly, if it's comparable in price, I would prefer this option over all the others... but I would assume it's about $150 a day. If so, that's almost everything I would earn on that Monday.


Candidate 2: The Nanny.
Pros: One of our PEPS friends referred us to the nanny they use four days a week (so she's been prescreened by people we trust). She has Mondays free, so that would work out beautifully. They love her to pieces; say she's really good with their son, and even cleans the house while he naps. In-home care is good for kids because they're in a familiar place with their familiar toys, and there isn't a "germ factor." Also, if the kid is sick, there's no keeping her home from day care -- she's already home! Rates are negotiable, but a little bird told me $11 an hour... which would be $88 for an 8-hour day.

She could learn Spanish! :-)

Cons: Since we have to pay someone to watch Vivian, I would kind of like her to be around other kids, so she can start to get socialized. Learning things like sharing, etc. Staying at home with a nanny one day, and with either Andrew or me on all the other days, is the kind of cloistered environment that wouldn't do any good in helping her adjust to other children.

My understanding is that she doesn't report her nanny income, so I don't think we'd be able to take the fees we paid her and use them as a direct offset of the taxes we owe.


Candidate 3: The Village.
Our next door neighbors, immigrants from Somalia, opened an in-home child care center last week. Were we ever surprised to see the sign! They have lots of children -- 5, I think? -- and the older ones help care for the younger ones. There's a little girl almost exactly Vivian's age, and there's a 2-month old baby. The oldest kid is 11.

We went over last night to check them out. Vivian charged around their house playing with all the toys (LOTS of toys).

Pros: Well, this would certainly help her acclimate to other kids! Having an early experience with a large family might be good for Vivian's understanding of the world.

They are a licensed in-home day care center. We could put any fees paid as a direct deduction off our taxes.

The price. $33 a day or so... honestly, that seems TOO low to me. How will $33 a day motivate anyone to do a good job?

She could learn Somali! :-)

Cons: Naptime is at 1:30, which is way too late for Vivian -- she can't hold out much past noon.

The weather is about to turn chilly, and playtime in the yard will have to be curtailed. Is their small house a good place to have that many kids all day long with no place to go? I mean, they're not going to go on walks around the neighborhood -- too few adults to wrangle all those kids -- and they're not going to pile them all in a car and take them anywhere. It's pretty much the house, or the yard. That's it.

With a 2-month old baby, the mother's attention will be very divided. The older kids will have to fend for themselves.

I'm worried that Vivian wouldn't get the amount of personal, one-on-one, caring interaction that she's used to. With that many kids, you sort of turn them loose and let them run around on their own. What if she swallows something she shouldn't, or gets pushed and falls down, or hurts herself? Vivian knows no fear. Who will protect her from herself if the kids are just running around like crazy?


What should we do??