I always figured that people in the future would find innovative ways to deal with all the problems we're creating today -- problems like landfills, for instance. Someone in the future is going to mine the hell out of those for their valuable components.

Looks like someone figured out a way to decompose a plastic bag. You have to grind up the bags into powder first, and there's a specific temperature range and type of microbe involved, but it's possible.

Hooray for science in the news!

I'm still wondering why the Kremlin's elite guard ordered 3,200 female mice back in March. So weird.

And lo, the skies darkened and the earth shook, and there were many links upon the land.

"Cholitas" women wrestlers in Bolivia: http://blog.foreignpolicy.com/node/8973

A beautiful, short poem called "Seeing the Eclipse in Maine"

Japanese scientists craft the world's smallest ramen bowl, complete with microscopic noodles

And, for those who like trying to puzzle out foreign languages, check out this picture from http://ma-gnus.livejournal.com/8869.html:

Any translations for me? Hugh, I know you can do it!

Just finished reading a fascinating, although disturbing, article from the October 2007 LA Weekly: The Life and Death of Jesse James. Author Harlan Ellison features as a side character in the central story of a real-life case of internet identity fraud and emotional victimization. (Article contains some strong language.)

A handy reminder to us all: You should try to actually meet someone in person before becoming romantically involved with him/her. As the article so wisely says,

Ever since we crawled out of the mud and started hitting each other over the head with rocks, attraction has worked this way: I see you across the room. You see me. Something clicks. We approach. We talk. If there’s some kind of connection between our inner selves — even if it’s just a mutual desire to rub chocolate pudding over each other’s naughty bits — we get on with the business at hand. But the Internet has turned things upside down. Now, things work the other way around. Our inner selves meet and connect, and then we get to the raw, physical-attraction thing. And while it’s painful to learn that someone you find physically attractive doesn’t go for you, how much more painful to find that someone whose soul speaks to you across the series of tubes that make up the World Wide Web doesn’t go for your fat ass and spotty face.

But the story is much more interesting than that. It's a very strange window into the world of a very strange, sad, twisted person who preys on the honest emotions of others. You should read it.

And, in the chronicles of synchronicity, Andrew got home a bit ago and, after hearing about the fascinating article I had just finished, showed me the book he had literally just finished a few minutes before, Isaac Asimov's book "Murder at the ABA," which is dedicated to none other than Harlan Ellison.

It's a Harlan Ellison Fest around here, I tell you.

Now I'll actually have to read some of his stuff... Feel free to comment with your outrage over me not having read any Harlan Ellison before... but only if you tell me what to read first, OK?

The buying team at work brought a new kind of product to my attention -- a decorative bean that has been laser-etched with a phrase. Upon germination, the bean swells up and then splits open as the plant continues to grow. It is one of the freakiest things I've seen for awhile.

In order to photograph these properly, we planted them, and now we have them on the windowsill near our desks. Our sample "Live, Laugh, Love" Bean Plant germinated just fine, but then died. I have to admit to some relief.

Our sample "Grow Peace" Bean Plant, on the other hand, is flourishing madly. The green stalks are about 3 feet high and seem to be scrabbling at the window to get out.

Every day I wonder whether it will snag me with a green tentacle as I walk by, or perhaps fruit out with new beans, inscribed with ominous warnings on them, warnings not placed there by any human hand... perhaps along the lines of:

Watch your step
I'm sorry
Green Power
The Bean Man Cometh
The Bean Times are Nigh
Beanpocalypse 2008

Fascinating article in Asia Times Online. Apparently right now in certain states of India, a special kind of bamboo is in flower. Sounds lovely, right?

The problem is that the seeds are devoured by rats, and the high protein content causes a massive explosion in rat population. The rats devour all the crops, leading to famines, unrest, and rebellions.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the fate of governments can hang on the flowering cycle of a certain species of bamboo.

Just got an e-mail from an e-mail address closely related to my own, but with .gr at the end for the country code. Any help translating it?

Γεια σου Lela,

Παίξε αυτό το φοβερό παιχνίδι!

http://www.starfinal.com/?safr=ad4bf03aa6354773b5fe4ade72e476ef3082c93b

Τα λέμε,

LELA


-----------

Ο/ή LELA (leukothea2003@yahoo.gr) σας έστειλε αυτό το e-mail μέσω του δικτυακού τόπου του Παιχνιδιού Heineken Star Final Η διεύθυνση e-mail σας χρησιμοποιήθηκε μόνο μια φορά για να σας σταλεί αυτό το μήνυμα και δεν θα αποθηκευτεί από τη Heineken ούτε θα χρησιμοποιηθεί για μελλοντική επικοινωνία.

From Wikipedia, here's a list of the 64 Kalas (art forms), according to "various Hindu shastra":

"Kalā (Sanskrit: कला) refers to art forms, attributes or virtues.

1. Histrionic Talents, Drama, story telling techniques, mnemonics etc.,
2. Making musical Instruments, simple mechanical devices etc.,
( But wait, there's more! )

So very much to comment on.

Here are a few things, just off the top of my head --

Gamers, you will notice that #9 ("Playing games like dice") leads seemingly inevitably to #10 ("Mastering eroticism as per Vatsyayana, erotic devices and sexual arts"). Woo hoo!

Parents, you will notice that #53 ("Child rearing & Pediatrics") leads, also seemingly inevitably, to #54 ("Punishing guilty appropriately by Law and Order").

#45, "Managing Oil Resources," leads to #46, "Having control over others' minds, spells, charms ,Omens." That explains Haliburton quite neatly.

And finally, what the heck is up with #20, "Making ICBM"? Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles are part of ancient Hindu texts??

Monday, March 10, is henceforth a celebration of all things awesome.

There's a webpage for it, so it must be true.

From the first page:

"How Can I Celebrate The International Day of Awesomeness?

The easiest way to celebrate The International Day of Awesomeness is to be awesome."

Well. *brushing off hands*  My work here is done.

Mommy, can we play airport security again? Can we can we can we can we can we can we???

McSweeny's has a very very very long page with people's writing about "new" foods. Packaged foods. Processed foods. You can send in your own story, if you have one.

I couldn't tear myself away from this page. The other night, I spent over an hour and a half reading it, until far too late at night, thinking "just one more and then I'll stop... just one more..." Just like eating Pringles or Twizzlers or something else truly dreadful.

At the end I was left with burning eyes and queasiness of the soul.

The scary-looking Zymogenetics building has a big banner on it reading:

FDA APPROVES RECOMBINANT THROMBIN!

Fill in joke here. Please note that "Hey, Recombinant Thrombin is my favorite band!" has already been taken.

Thanks to krblack for the link to this Esquire article about the worst building ever -- a monstrously ugly, unfinished, evil-looking hotel in Pyongyang.

Wow. A modern-day Tarot deck should use this debacle as "The Tower" card.

This sounds beyond vile.

New Burger King "Ketchup & Fries"- or "Flame-Broiled"-flavored "snacks" from the vending machine.

Why? Just.... why?

To get the thought of that unholy abomination out of my head, I turned to "Cheap Healthy Good" and found a scrumptious-sounding recipe for Garlicky Broccoli Rabe. Mmmmmmm, greens & garlic.

Here's this year's "Holiday Gift Guide at Epicurious," a site for foodies. A couple wood platters from my online store are shown on slide 11 of the slideshow.

In a somewhat related note, there is such a thing as a Vegetable Orchestra. Here's a YouTube video of orchestra members choosing their fresh produce -- carrots, cabbages, eggplants, bell peppers, etc. -- turning the produce into (short-lived) musical instruments, and then playing something on them. They're playing something well-suited to a vegetable orchestra. It ain't classical music, which demands careful tuning and complicated fretwork. But still, it's impressive. I have not seen someone wailing on a carrot / bell pepper trumpet before.

Plumpy'nut is a shelf-stable food product that reverses famine in severely undernourished children without the need for hospitalization.

To clean up big oil spills, companies usually use petroleum-based products. Turns out there's a much better way: soaking it up with mats made of human hair, which is unusually suited to soaking up oil. The mats can then be composted and eaten by special, oily-hair-mat-eating mushrooms.

Really. I could not make this up if I tried.
http://www.matteroftrust.org/programs/natural.html
And it's a 501(c)3 charity, no less. Hooray for biological science!

Finally, this is a wrong thing to do to your coworkers. Or to anyone, really. I'm sure of it.
The ThinkGeek Annoy-A-Tron
Yep, wrong.

My coworker Rian Cool (yes, that's his real name) knows the most interesting people. He writes: 

"If you're into the world of oddities .... more specifically Competition food eating ... there's a spectacle going down tonight @ 5 pm @ Pier 66 Anthony's restaurant.

My pal Eric "The Red" Denmark (ranked #12 in the world overall and #1 in spicy foods) is attempting two, back-to-back world records for eating hot peppers.

First, he will go for the official Guinness book record of 16 Jalapenos in 1 minute. That should be a piece of cake for him ... he's done over 30 before. The rules hamper him in this a bit, as the Guinness judge needs to look in his mouth after he swallows each pepper. Still .. he's confident in putting down 30 after weeks of honing his technique.

Then .. as if that's not enough to "sit on" ... he's going to turn around and set a new, never attempted record for Habenero peppers eaten in 1 minute  .... and no liquids can be consumed during and for 5 minutes afterward!! Can you say: "Pain"?
He again hopes to put down 30.
FYI - Habeneros are 100 times hotter than regular Jalapenos. OUCH!!!!!!!!

If interested .... come on down. It goes down at 5 pm and will live on 950 KJR FM with the Groz.

You can read up on Eric here:
http://erikdenmark.blogspot.com/

Now that's some HOT SPAM!"

And another funny animal story for today.

From http://apnews.myway.com/article/20070828/D8R9Q0T00.html:


Wayward Emu Corralled in Parking Lot
Aug 28, 12:09 AM (ET)

(AP) Rick Takacs hugs his emu Myron in West Bend, Wis., Monday, Aug. 27, 2007 afternoon. Myron escaped... Full Image

WEST BEND, Wis. (AP) - Attention, Wal-Mart shoppers: The emu in the parking lot is not for sale.

Employees of a Wal-Mart Supercenter used shopping carts to corral a wayward emu outside the store Monday about 6 a.m., West Bend police said.

A manager fed the emu grapes and apples in an attempt to calm the bird inside the makeshift enclosure.

Richard Takacs, the owner of 3-year-old Myron, speculated the bird had been chased from his nearby farm by a coyote.

Emus can't fly, but Takacs said he wasn't surprised when police contacted him from the store, about two miles north of his Meadowbrook Market and Pumpkin Farm.

"They can run 40 miles an hour, so that was just a quick sprint for Myron," Takacs said.

Two other emus from the farm also bolted from their pen but were found unharmed in a nearby pumpkin field.

Takacs retrieved the apparently frightened Myron from the 24-hour Wal-Mart and placed the bird by itself in a pasture so it could feel safe and relax.

Emus can grow up to six feet tall and weigh as much as 100 pounds.

West Bend is in southeastern Wisconsin, about 35 miles northwest of Milwaukee.

My friend Nikki sent me some pictures of people's hands, painted with amazing attention to detail and posed to look like various animals.

I wonder where these came from. Who thought of doing this? And how long did it take?

My dad sent us a new "Wiggles" DVD to entertain Vivian. We popped it in this morning for the first time, since Andrew is still sick (he has another dr. app't. this afternoon), and I'm trying to work from home.

Several of the songs that we know by heart, songs that we have heard literally hundreds and hundreds of times, are on this DVD -- in Spanish.

It is very surreal to see the "Mariachi Wiggles" singing these familiar songs in Spanish. Vivian just stares at the screen, trying to make sense of it all. Come to think of it, so does Andrew. Must be even more surreal if one is on pain medication. :-O

Here's a funny posting from the Best of Craigslist. (http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/179435238.html)


To the guy I gave a skull to.

I just wanted to let you know I wasn't a crazy lady. Here's what happened:

A guy was running for a train. I saw something go flying off the end of his cane (yes, he was running with a cane). After a few seconds of me and other waiting passengers looking around stupidly at each other, I decided to be a Good Samaritan. I picked it up and saw that it was a small, polished replica of a human skull. I looked to the old man standing next to me and said "It's a skull". He shrugged his shoulders. I didn't want it, but I have such a particular hatred of littering, that I didn't want to drop it back on the floor lest someone think I was a dirty skull litterer. I decided the proper thing to do would be to give it back to whoever dropped the thing.

So, I jumped in the door of the L train and saw you with what I thought was a cane. So I said, "Here's your skull" and handed it to you. You were shocked, I thought because you didn't realize it was lost. But as I backed off the train as the doors closed I saw that it wasn't a cane you had but an umbrella. And luggage. And you clearly weren't the person who dropped the skull.

I can't imagine how weird it must have been to have some woman run onto a train, shove a skull in your hand and tell you it's yours. So I'm just writing this to let you know it wasn't a voodoo ritual, an ominous mafia warning, a gang initiation, or a misguided attempt at getting to know you better. I truly thought you dropped your skull.

Now what did you do with it? I'm dying to know!

Feds Pounce on Student Dressed As a Ninja

Apr 12, 10:38 PM (ET)

ATHENS, Ga. (AP) - Running through the University of Georgia campus as a ninja can elicit a prompt response from authorities, a UGA sophomore learned.

Federal Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearm agents, on campus for a community training project, detained Jeremiah Ransom of Macon Tuesday as a "suspicious individual" when they spotted a masked figure darting near the Georgia Center.

Ransom told The Red & Black student newspaper that he had left a Wesley Foundation pirate vs. ninja event when he was snared by agents with guns drawn.

"It was surreal," Ransom said. "I was jogging from Wesley to Snelling (cafeteria) when I heard someone yell 'freeze.'" At first, he thought a friend was playing a joke.

University Police Chief Jimmy Williamson said Ransom was released as soon as he was found to have violated no laws.

Vanessa McLemore, the ATF special agent in charge, said agents thought something was amiss when they "noticed someone wearing a bandanna across the face and acting in a somewhat suspicious manner, peeping around the corner" then breaking into a run.

Williamson said Ransom was wearing black sweat pants and an athletic T-shirt with one red bandanna covering the bottom half of his face and another covering the top of his head.